Tim was depressed. He was a wealth manager with tons of money, four grand homes in iconic locations, and a garage full of fine cars, all paid for. He took frequent “buddy” trips abroad, usually hunting for big game in exclusive preserves with his clients and their friends. With two kids now away in universities, he approached me for depression and anxiety counseling, asking for help with a now “empty nest” that was anything but happy. He and his wife were fighting constantly, and the family dynamics around them had been especially poisonous since the children had left home. And Tim was a recovering alcoholic with a severe eating disorder. It would take some time.

In this blog, I’m going to describe the relationship between depression and anxiety, sharing vignettes from my Delray Beach therapy practice to illustrate. In Tim’s story, of course, the names and identifying details have been changed to protect privacy. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or situations, past or present, is purely coincidental.

How Does Depression Differ From Anxiety?

Depression is a feeling of “stuck on shutdown”. It usually involves persistent feelings of sadness, emptiness, loss of pleasure, fatigue, slowed thinking or movement, hopelessness, and possibly changes in sleep or appetite. Depression usually makes a person withdraw from people and activities and creates a unique vulnerability to substance abuse. Like anxiety (a feeling of “stuck on high alert”), depression is related to the brain’s stress–response system.

While a deep dive into neuroscience is beyond our scope today, the brain can be thought of as divided into three important functioning parts: the amygdala (threat detection), hippocampus (memory and meaning, or “salience”), and prefrontal cortex (emotion regulation). They form a “nervous system” that constantly scans the environment and judges people, places, and events for relevance, meaning, and safety. Anxiety and depression also share the same chemical messaging systems for the brain, especially serotonin, norepinephrine, dopamine, and cortisol. When these systems are out of balance, anxiety, depression, or both can result.

This “nervous system” can become dysregulated from many causes. Traumatic adverse childhood experiences are the biggest set of causes. Drug and alcohol abuse and severe eating disorders play havoc here. We also learn from the modeled behavior of our caregivers. When the nervous system becomes dysregulated—often from trauma, chronic stress, or prolonged emotional overwhelm—it can express itself in two main directions: anxiety and depression, or both.

What Do Depression and Anxiety Have in Common?

These two behavioral constellations, anxiety and depression, are problem-solving strategies at their core. We learn how to solve problems from those who gave us life. A pinched and anxious mother who wrings her hands at every problem will likely spawn an anxious and unhappy child. A father whose predominant state of mind is depression and finds solace in withdrawing from life will likely have offspring who express the same tendencies. Sometimes we learn from nannies and babysitters, or aunts, uncles, and grandparents. Our development is not always one for one with the role model we lived around. It can sometimes be the opposite, with anxious parenting, for example, inspiring a chronically depressed child.

Can Anxiety and Depression Lead to Addiction?

Tim grew up with an alcoholic father who expressed both depression and anxiety depending on his drinking, along with a rage toward Tim, his siblings, and his mother. This kind of stormy unpredictability made Tim’s life primarily anxious and fearful of the next explosion from his father. He began smoking cigarettes when he was 12. The nicotine soothed him. He took up drinking in high school to relax and “feel normal,” and as a way of becoming socially competent.

It would be years before he would understand the connection between his anxiety, periodic bouts of depression, and his very dysregulated diet. Getting sober from alcohol was his first, and most important, lifestyle change. Alcohol had become his tool for controlling anxiety. Food, and a habit of binging and purging, would later become his source of comfort during depression. At least he could control his food intake.

How Does Anxiety Affect Relationships?

Tim lived on a seesaw of emotions. He met Tina at his company, where she worked in a support role for the wealth managers, and they married within the year. Two children followed quickly, and they built their first home together. Tim was still drinking regularly and heavily when they met. Both liked a vibrant social life around like-minded drinkers and “party people.” The regular use of alcohol disguised some serious disagreements for years. Only when Tim got sober did they understand their fierce battle over money.

How Anxiety Can Affect Connection and Communication

Tina’s family was poor, and she’d never had any money of her own to speak of. She gladly turned over the “financial executive” role to her husband, who was by now creating his own great wealth. Tina felt free to spend, and she did so lavishly, buying expensive art and furniture for their home without restraint. Just a year before Tim sought my help, they’d tried an “allowance” system in which her funds were restricted by him to certain amounts. This set up a battle royale and a furious war over control of their households, their resource,s and their children.

Both were depressed during our first sessions. Tina was frequently in tears, and Tim was nearing the end of his rope with anger and frustration. Communication, especially around money, had been difficult and hostile throughout their entire marriage. Now, without alcohol to dampen their awareness and suppress their feelings, the pain of their impasse felt life-threatening.

As a relationship and anxiety therapist in Delray Beach, I’ve noticed that many couples never get around to asking hard questions in their marriage. Questions like: Who decides what each of us spends? How wealthy do we need to be? Should we both work? How do we agree on major purchases? And many more. They both had adopted a “paternal” approach to these money issues. It’s no surprise it began failing.

Recovery from Anxiety and Depression Possible: Words of Hope From an Anxiety Therapist in Delray Beach

Tim’s strength in recovery became a source of wisdom for them both. Eventually, Tina stopped her own drinking. They both had been covering their discontent with alcohol and money. Once they gained ground on sobriety from alcohol together, their lives underwent a sea change. They began to explore the possibility of “financial sobriety” and “emotional sobriety.” Through couples and anxiety therapy, they began learning about proper boundaries with their grown children. As they communicated more skillfully, they began to relax more in session. They dropped the defenses that had caused them so much pain. Their periods of high anxiety and depression lessened considerably. Eventually, harmony was restored in their home.

If you or someone you love is struggling with unhealed trauma and the anxiety and/or depression that follows, it can be empowering to ask for help. Especially if alcohol, drug abuse, or sex addiction is present, or if money is a forbidden topic. Couples therapy can create new paths to satisfying adult health and bring fresh success to difficult relationships. It’s a wise investment and may take time, but the payoff can be priceless.

I would love to help. Call or text me at 561-213-8030 or email me at jdlmhc@gmail.com for a consultation.

Are Your Depression and Anxiety Linked? Find Clarity and Healing Through Anxiety Therapy in Delray Beach, FL

If you’re struggling with low mood, emotional numbness, or a loss of motivation—but don’t feel “anxious” in the usual sense—you’re not alone, and you’re not imagining it. Anxiety and depression can overlap, but they don’t always show up together. Anxiety therapy offers a supportive space to understand what you’re experiencing, clarify how anxiety may still be operating beneath the surface, and begin moving toward relief and emotional balance. At my Delray Beach counseling practice, I help clients make sense of these patterns and develop tools that support lasting mental and emotional well-being.

Here’s how you can begin finding answers and feeling better:

• 1. Explore whether anxiety, depression, or both are affecting you during a confidential consultation.
• 2. Learn practical strategies to address underlying anxiety and regain a sense of stability with guidance from an experienced Delray Beach anxiety therapist.
• 3. Build healthier coping skills, emotional clarity, and resilience—so you can move forward with greater confidence and peace of mind.

Other Services With John Davis Counseling in Delray Beach, Florida

Depression and anxiety can look and feel different for each person—sometimes showing up as constant worry, and other times as emotional numbness, fatigue, or a sense of disconnection from life. Anxiety therapy offers a supportive place to understand how these experiences overlap, identify what’s driving them, and begin restoring motivation, emotional balance, and a sense of hope.

Because mood and anxiety concerns often intersect with other areas of life, my Delray Beach counseling practice provides a wide range of therapeutic services to support whole-person healing. Along with anxiety and depression therapy, I offer relationship therapy, couples counseling, trauma-focused treatment, addiction recovery support, grief counseling, and therapy for narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). I also work with individuals managing ADHD/ADD, impulse-control challenges, and spiritual or existential concerns.

Every treatment plan is tailored to your unique needs using an integrative, evidence-based approach. Depending on your goals, therapy may include CBT, EMDR, Gestalt therapy, mindfulness practices, psychodrama, or clinical hypnosis. My goal is to help you build lasting emotional resilience, strengthen coping skills, and regain a steadier sense of calm, clarity, and emotional well-being. I invite you to explore my blog for additional insight or contact my office to schedule a consultation.

About the Author

John Davis, LMHC, is a highly respected therapist in Delray Beach with extensive experience helping individuals address anxiety and depression rooted in trauma, emotional stress, and long-standing relational patterns. Using a trauma-informed, integrative approach that includes EMDR, CBT, psychodrama, and mindfulness, John supports clients as they navigate mood disorders, emotional overwhelm, and the impact of early life experiences on mental health. With a strong foundation in child and family therapy, he understands how unresolved dynamics can contribute to anxiety and depressive symptoms in adulthood. As Executive Director of the Mental Health Counselors’ Association of Palm Beach, a recipient of the Outstanding Community Service Award, and an expert marriage counselor featured on StayMarriedFlorida.com, John is widely trusted for his clinical insight and leadership. His work helps clients reduce emotional distress, strengthen healthy coping skills, and restore clarity, stability, and emotional well-being.