Traumatic experiences in early childhood can leave debilitating negative impressions that may persist for a lifetime. For our purposes, we’ll define trauma here as a condition, event, or series of events that overwhelm our ability to cope, causing combinations of difficult emotions such as fear, anger, and/or grief. These feelings may rise again later in life and become intrusive in our thoughts and dreams. More importantly, these traumatic experiences may leave behind self-limiting beliefs that lie beneath our conscious awareness and cause us to think and behave in ways we do not understand. Relationships are likely to be difficult and hard to maintain. Moods that shift easily under the slightest social or interpersonal pressure are a hallmark.

A common strategy for answering the discomfort brought by unresolved trauma is the abuse of substances like alcohol, cannabis, other drugs, or even food. Here at John Davis Counseling, we adhere to a framework of understanding called NARM, short for Neuro Affective Relational Model. The NeuroAffective Relational Model (NARM) is an approach to working with the effects of complex and developmental trauma. Developed by Dr. Laurence Heller, NARM focuses less on revisiting past traumatic events and more on the survival patterns people developed in response—patterns that often involved disconnecting to stay safe.

In this blog, I’ll describe the relationship between trauma and unresolved anxiety by way of a vignette from my practice. In the story that follows, the names and identifying details have been changed to protect privacy. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or situations, past or present, is purely coincidental.

How Does Trauma Diminish Your Confidence and Voice?

Lyn sat before me with a woolen shawl draped over her tiny frame, even though it was warm outside. Her arms were extraordinarily thin, and her facial bones protruded beyond her hollow cheeks. I guessed her weight at around 90 pounds. It was clear that I was looking at a woman who’d struggled with eating. She was emaciated. At 35, she’d had a difficult life. She’d rarely been employed successfully. She’d been married and divorced twice. These marriages were to husbands who were verbally and emotionally abusive. She sought my help through my Delray Beach therapy practice after a series of panic attacks she couldn’t explain. Hopefully, she had met someone she felt very special about and wanted to marry again.

Doubting Your Accomplishments

Lyn expressed very little self-confidence. She would regularly second-guess herself in almost every situation of any importance. She’d worked hard as a yoga teacher and had developed quite a following of women who loved how she was in the rooms and the special compassion she brought to her teaching. But she had no compassion for herself. Several times during our work together, she passed on significant opportunities to travel and work at exotic resort destinations. “I just don’t feel like I can do it” was her familiar refrain. Despite the community feedback, Lyn refused to believe in her accomplishments. She believed she had no power.

Allowing Mistreatment From Others

In both her marriages, Lyn had been emotionally and verbally abused. She seemed to choose similar male partners in both marriages, men who were rough-hewn and constantly demanded sex from her, despite her meager protests. She’d grown up believing that she could never speak up for herself, and regularly suppressed her feelings. She could never say no specially to a sexual advance. She’d somehow learned that appeasing men with her body was the only way to get through her very unhappy life and the only real avenue to affection. She’d been depressed for many years before we met.

How Does Childhood Trauma Show Up in Adulthood?

Lyn grew up with an alcoholic mother and a father who was always absent. Neither of Lyn’s parents was aware when an older male cousin forced himself sexually on her during times he was supposedly “babysitting” for them. He would regularly warn her that if she spoke out and told anyone about the abuse, he’d hurt her brother and sister. She felt trapped. She felt she had to agree to the sexual molestation in order to prevent harm to her siblings.

He preyed on her for several years before he was caught by his own mother, who sent him away. Still, her own mother refused to believe Lyn’s story about her cousin. Instead, she maintained a false front of shaming Lyn to protect her own ego. She couldn’t admit her failures as a parent to protect Lyn. With this unhealed trauma and absence of support, Lyn felt her life out of control. She remembered longing for the validation of her mother when she finally told the truth. Someone would believe her. It never came.

The Draw to Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

Food became her first experience of gaining control of her life. She discovered that she could keep herself thin and sexually attractive by purging the food she ate. This gave her a power she’d never possessed. Control over food eventually came to mean control over men and the sexual experiences they demanded. She controlled her body by denying her appetite. This excessive dietary control would plague her for years. She would eventually find more “control” by becoming heavily involved in yoga as a method of controlling her always-present anxiety and seeking a “blissed out” state by manipulating her body. During yoga sessions, she became oblivious, the opposite of mindful. She used yoga to feel the emotional experience of control. Lyn had learned to use “dissociation” to avoid strong and uncomfortable feelings.

Yoga can be wonderful. I’ve used it to accompany meditation with my daily workouts since college. It can deliver some real feelings of peace and security. But it’s important that “blissing out” does not become a form of emotional avoidance or disassociation, especially for individuals who have experienced trauma. A balanced practice involves staying present and listening to one’s body rather than using the feeling to escape reality. It is important not to seek just the fleeting feeling of bliss itself, but a deeper state of inner harmony and self-realization that goes beyond temporary sensations. Lyn had become lost in this practice and disoriented because of it.

How Can Therapy Help You Regain Your Power and Self-Worth?

Lyn began to change and grow after several months of talking regularly. She took a break from yoga teacher involvement and kept up her own simple practice, seeking this time to be mindful of strong emotions and discursive thinking. Slowly, she made the cognitive connections between her early childhood molestations and current behaviors and choices, especially putting herself down and failures to speak up for herself. She developed compassion for her younger self, who had little choice when forced to perform shameful, abusive sexual acts. She became more aware of how grief and anger were being expressed in her body and behavior. As a seasoned anxiety therapist, I’ve witnessed how common it is for survivors of sexual trauma to experience mystifying emotions during sex. Spontaneous grief is also very common.

As she began to understand her subsequent poor relationship and sexuality choices, her awareness flourished, and her body began to change. For the first time in years, she began putting on a small amount of weight. Together, we incorporated supplementary sessions with a diet coach who encouraged her and held her accountable to an eating plan. Using hypnosis and EMDR, along with deep breathing exercises, Lyn was gradually able to change some of her core negative beliefs and “reconstitute” the memories she’d carried since childhood. “I am powerless” became “I’ve gained strong trust in myself.”

Healing Anxiety and Trauma: Confidence and True Connection

Lyn’s new relationship took on new color and vibrancy. She was better able to say “no” and “no thank you” more regularly and with a confidence she found exciting. Lyn had been lucky to find a person who genuinely seemed to love her and was more than eager to cooperate in her therapy by way of couples work. In this new relationship, Lyn began to see herself differently. She reveled in the discoveries that came, and found she didn’t have to sacrifice affection to claim her power. She could say no, especially to sexual advances in ways that left harmony and goodwill rather than tears, as it had in her marriages.

Trauma and Anxiety Don’t Have to Control Your Life: Final Thoughts From an Anxiety Therapist in Delray Beach

If you or someone you love is struggling with unresolved trauma and the thought distortions and anxiety that follow, it can be empowering to ask for help. Especially if substance abuse or sexual difficulty is present. Trauma and anxiety therapy can create new paths to satisfying adult health and bring fresh success to difficult relationships. It’s a wise investment and may take time, but the payoff can be priceless. I would love to help. Call or text me at 561-213-8030 or email me at jdlmhc@gmail.com for a consultation.

Heal Trauma-Driven Anxiety and Reclaim Your Sense of Self Through Anxiety Therapy in Delray Beach, FL

When trauma reshapes how you see yourself, anxiety often follows—showing up as self-doubt, fear, hypervigilance, or a constant sense of unease. Anxiety therapy offers a compassionate, structured space to understand how past experiences are influencing your self-image and nervous system, and to begin healing at the root. At my Delray Beach, FL counseling practice, I help clients move beyond coping alone by rebuilding internal safety, confidence, and emotional clarity.

Here’s how you can begin restoring balance and self-trust:

• 1. Explore how trauma may be shaping your anxiety and self-perception by scheduling a confidential consultation.
• 2. Learn practical tools to calm your nervous system, challenge trauma-based beliefs, and reduce anxiety with support from an experienced anxiety therapist in Delray Beach.
• 3. Reconnect with a healthier sense of identity, resilience, and emotional stability—so anxiety no longer defines how you see yourself or your future.

Other Services John Davis Provides in Delray Beach, Florida

Trauma often fuels anxiety by keeping the nervous system stuck in a constant state of alert, fear, or self-doubt. Through anxiety therapy, you can begin to safely process traumatic experiences, understand how they affect your thoughts and body, and develop tools that restore a sense of calm, stability, and control.

Because trauma-related anxiety is rarely a single-issue concern, my Delray Beach practice offers a wide range of therapeutic services to support healing from multiple angles. Alongside anxiety-focused therapy, I provide trauma therapy, relationship therapy, couples counseling, addiction treatment, grief and loss support, and therapy for narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). I also work with individuals navigating ADHD/ADD, impulse-control challenges, and spiritual or existential questions.

Each client receives a personalized, integrative treatment plan tailored to their history and goals. Depending on what’s most appropriate, therapy may incorporate EMDR, CBT, Gestalt therapy, mindfulness, psychodrama, or clinical hypnosis. My goal is to help you strengthen emotional resilience, reduce anxiety at its source, and rebuild a sense of inner safety and balance. For additional insight, I invite you to explore my blog or reach out directly to schedule a consultation.

About the Author

John Davis, LMHC, is an experienced therapist in Delray Beach, FL, who specializes in treating trauma-driven anxiety by helping clients understand how past experiences shape ongoing fear, self-doubt, and emotional overwhelm. With a strong background in child and family therapy, John recognizes how anxiety develops over time and becomes embedded in both the mind and body.

Using a trauma-informed, integrative approach, he helps clients identify the root causes of anxiety, break cycles of avoidance, and rebuild emotional regulation and self-trust. As Executive Director of the Mental Health Counselors’ Association of Palm Beach, a recipient of the Outstanding Community Service Award, and an expert therapist featured on StayMarriedFlorida.com, John is widely respected for his clinical leadership. His work supports clients in restoring calm, clarity, and a grounded sense of safety in their daily lives.